Anticipation
I was looking out my window at the rain. I was thinking that we need just the right amount of rain; enough to fill the reservoirs and provide water for the fish but not enough to flood Napa. Napa always floods. I was also anticipating the upcoming fishing season. I know, steelheaders have been up to their belts in rain-swollen, frigid rivers all winter, but I have not yet lost my mind enough to join them. I was thinking of that large rainbow just under that ledge I know about. Mentally I was delicately placing my perfect cast just over his nose. The drift was perfect. He rose to take my fly. And WHAM, I jerk the fly right out of his mouth. What a dope!! I can't set the hook right even in my daydreams.
We anticipate a wide variety of things: meeting with friends, the movie I am dying to see, the trip to the upper Sac, or seeing my grandson walk for the first time. Anticipation is the feeling that makes waiting so agonizingly long. It is one of the spices of life. Yet, what is anticipated is generally over so quickly, we barely have time to enjoy it. It then becomes just another memory. Enjoy it while it lasts. Live the experience while it's there.
There is a difference between anticipation and worry. Anticipation is the Christmas morning feeling: giddy, joyous, energetic, hopeful, knowing good things are on their way. Worry is marked with downcast hopes, feelings of helplessness, and the inability to change the train-wreck that we know is coming. I have no use for worry in my life. Bad things will come. Worrying about them won't make them any less bad. It just makes my life bad longer.
Anticipation can be a good thing. I use it to drive my event planning. The more I anticipate a thing, like a fishing trip, the more I will work at getting it just right, have all the right gear, make sure everyone has their stuff, and praying that the weather cooperates. When I really anticipate a thing, I dance around, barely able to sit still. This drives my wife nuts. But I don't care. The little kid in me just comes out. And, I am not ashamed at all. In fact, it's one of my strong points. Butterflies in your stomach are one of the signs that you're alive. And isn't that why we do what we do. People who have no things to anticipate just sit around and worry about where their life is going. And damn, they should be worried. We only have so much time on this rock and we better enjoy it while we can.
This month we can all anticipate the upcoming fishing season. The fishouts are being scheduled. Make it a point to go on them. The fishmasters do a lot of work and enjoy sharing their experiences with us. It's not hard. Why, I even arranged some. Use the fishing buddies area of the web site. You don't have to like the person you're fishing with. You just need to tolerate them long enough to get to and from the water. Having friends from PFF makes it that much more enjoyable for all.
Get out of town! Go fishing!
– George Conway